Spaceman

What more do I have to offer you?

What more could I give?

What more do you want?

What other piece of myself have I not shared?

What words,

what thoughts,

what acts have I not devoted to you?

What blood,

what sweat,

what seed have I not given to you?

What flesh would satiate your hunger?

What bits of brain and bone would appease you?

 

Devourer of men,

heartless and bottomless void.

I would carve out my own heart if it would quiet you.

I would drain my body of every fluid to slake your endless thirst.

This world is a vampire.

This world is a succubus.

Devil concubine.

Unholy and repugnant allure.

 

Take it from me.

 

I yearn for you.

In the dead of winter I love your stark absence of life;

the dearth of fecundity.

In summer,

I languish in your hellish heat;

knowing every photon is killing my body.

The life giver,

is the death bringer.

I am connected to you

by every atom of my form.

Every breath I breathe is you

and every cell of my body

cries out for your touch.

 

I am a spaceman,

careening through the abject mystery,

on a rocky ball,

a dirty, wet castaway;

and I crave this miserable existence

that is life itself.

 

In orbit;

detached by from the whole of the Earth,

separated from my humanity

by thousands of dead miles;

I still feel the compulsion.

The draw of pouted lips.

The depth of sultry eyes.

Crashing into you is inevitable.

My death is certain,

and I relish the day

I am physically driven into you,

our bodies smashed together

with irresistible, cosmic force,

and we are inextricable once more.

 

Scintillating and deplorable;

this madness,

cut to fit.

The “Goldilocks Zone” of sanity.

Deprived of your winsome gaze,

the mind turns,

and withers,

and shrivels to a desiccated husk.

I was born for you,

from you

to be with you

forever.

 

“This is Spaceman;

Initiating re-entry.”

 

HG – 2017