Nurture Not The Hurt

After every disaster there is a moment where we get to choose to put it all back together the way we were, the way it was, or making something new.   We see so much of the same old, same old shit. Why would we want to rebuild what led to it? Why not make […]

Warm

I’ve been finding comfort in the unseen. All that it asks of me is that I believe. A single wreck disabled all the night. Swept right off the table of my life.   Don’t got no problem, no-no-no more, singing with grace in my heart I poured, out. Putting despair away, not fair today.   […]

Slumber Crawl

Fall is slowing to a crawl. I’m moaning prayers and confessions. Ongoing, a given direction.   So, now I’m disarmed, stripped of my barbs, relieved of my scars. Holding high and lowly, with a love so holy.   I’ve been all we are.   Could be – but it never is, what we let ourselves […]

Finished?

Seeing just a little more, since morning, now I realize, or think that I at least have opened my eyes. Letting go of all I’ve known, time to see how much I’ve grown; to the edge and beyond, the right and the wrong.   Here lies true beauty, in this wide eyed girl, in awe […]

Been Through Hell

Bracing myself for the impact, amazed at the walls as they go rushing past, elated – euphoric – when I don’t crash; like I’ve done so many times before.   I won’t be restrained – remain in place, a grin spreads across my face. Through Hell I come home, a battle won – the war […]

Been Through

No waste – Just taste Denied every other pleasure. A long time gone, facing torment beyond measure. Left reassured that it’s all over, abandoned past that haunts forever.   Standing on top of a pain felt so long, so many months into years, I’ve been wrong. First to admit that I faced down some shit, […]

Visually Distorted

Vision – This uncompromising stare, lays me bare – layer by layer. No cover – No other No faking it. True one and to you the ultimate. Feed off the mistakes of our loved ones. Consume – Regurgitate and hope you don’t choke on it.   Exposed – Naked as a newborn I grow – […]

Regardless

Come on and go past the sweet beyond, this is what you have been waiting for for so long.   Cradle to the whole received, dead is what was once believed and a new one rises from the ash. Belligerent – Ignorant take what you can, or can’t to make a place for it.   […]

Emancipate

I’m running out, stripping away, done holding back, or holding on. Done none too much, staggered to stay and wait ’till someone comes along. It don’t take me away, I’m trying to run on out. See the same thing day after day, trying to walk, feet nailed down.   Will she save me? Or can […]

Bitter Water Healin’

The past – never lasts. The cure – is so unsure. I’ve broken every cast, spiked the mix and still it’s pure.   Unadulterated – Chronic masturbated I know, I probably should have waited, can’t remain this aggravated – and surviving on nothing’s just part of disbelief. Holding close to closing, press the button for […]

One Time

So wrong – So right – Never mattered in any scheme I’ve ever been a part, adds another facet to the shard stuck in my heart. Begged forgiveness, but good and evil just melted away. In this rush – I am hushed, there’s so little left to say. Need friends – the company of demons […]

Anywhere but Forward

Stuck in neutral, these bloodshot eyes say it all. Severed from energy, caught in starvation’s thrall.   Rebirth the anti-Christ. Hang and bleed.   It don’t matter no more. Just an excuse, or alibi away from me to go anywhere but forward.   Want to let go, but the nothing is so comforting. If only […]

Grinning

Oh no, it ain’t easy, to play the fool so well and fall into the pitfalls of your funhouse every time. Hope it pleases you to watch me laugh and tumble down upon my face; degraded on the incline.   Burn my hands – I grip life tighter Smash me down – I climb back […]

A Real Life of Waste

There is an instant when the question begs an answer and procrastination just don’t make the grade. All the hours spent in harmful distraction are ever really worth the prices paid. A need unfilled provides a way into me for every harmful and angry impulse. No self-destruction, but what comforts me, is an embrace with […]

Medicine

I got down – dog tired, dried out – and drunk again. Was laid out a long time, lost myself and my friends.   I guess that’s the price you pay to feel a little better than you probably deserve most times. Got to find a better way than these masters I usually serve; don’t […]

You Are Weak

You are weak. Always given over, yet you never change at all. Just stay a punk, keep sucking up to some other motherfuck, who won’t be there to catch you when you fall.   You’re so afraid, fear’s driven you crazy. Salvation ain’t that easy, at least not when you’re me. Survival is not the […]

Dream With me

This state of mind remains falling from grace each day, but in the night it shines; dreams the world away. And for a little while I smile, ’cause the world it can’t touch me, I close my eyes real tight and my mind it is released.   Awake life – lives and dies, grating – […]

This Disease

I am feeling so much more that I ever have before. Not even wondering why, no end to what’s behind my eyes.   Heal me – No longer chaos and confusion. of my – Misdirected frustration. disease – Coming down like rain. – No end to the pain-   Congregations of believers, let all of […]

Fat City Retox

Detox, clean a long time now. Retox, Gotta get the fuck out. Been held hostage by it all, every drink and powder. All my friends watched me fall, gave it up for depression.   There comes a time when wasting don’t get all that special. Any alcoholic knows it feels like the devil. But this […]