I think I get it now,
all the rules You laid down.
I think I understand
the Love behind Your plans.
I know I was
trying to be numb.
Broken and hoping
that bliss would overcome.
Straight is the way
and narrow the door.
We die in the middle,
still asking for more.
It’s a shame.
It’s a sin.
Where it all begins
is in the places
we’re missing
ourselves.
I think I’ve come around
to the way You have found.
I think it’s clearer here.
The past starts to disappear.
Back when I did drugs,
I tried to end my pain.
Hiding from myself
and chasing life away.
I didn’t see it then.
I didn’t comprehend.
Nothing I did made sense,
but You saw me though the end.
You didn’t let me
fall in upon myself.
The simple comfort
of succumbing,
becoming my own hell.
I guess You know me
all too well.
Even if I go now.
I’ve fought another round.
Even if this is it,
I will never forget
that You showed me
how this life could be
without all of my
creative miseries.
You shone light upon
my longest mysteries.
Somehow You’ve always
been there for me.
How could I have been so blind?
Now, I see the light shine.
DJR – 2023
