01.11.20

Tell me what you want from me.

Don’t lie,

don’t hide,

don’t ascribe

your desires to another’s heart.

I have prayed for you.

I have slaved for you.

I have killed for you,

and yet you still

keep yourself from me.

 

I can stay no longer.

I am going on

to the next thing,

and the next thing,

and the next thing after that.

You took from me,

you used me

for your own needs.

Now, I have my own fate

that I must appease.

 

I walk away,

and you stand there

in the doorway.

I can hear the sobs,

but I keep walking.

The dust blows

in swirling columns

down our dirt road.

You close your eyes

for an instant,

and I am gone.

 

We suffered each other

long enough.

Too long to be healthy,

but not long enough

to find

our salvation.

My principle,

my avarice

and my downfall.

You were everything to me,

up to,

and becoming

my death.

 

I hope to make the coast by nightfall,

so I can stand

in the salt breeze

and let it take your scent off me.

I may cry then,

I may scream

out at the endless water,

but I won’t eat my gun,

or slit my throat.

 

I love you,

but I can’t stay here.

I am better as a ghost

than as a man.

Believe in you,

like you believed in me.

Use yourself,

drain yourself,

like to took from me.

You’ll find,

I am sure,

an endless ocean.

You’ll be okay

and I

will be alive.

 

-HG

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