A cross
to bear;
a certain time has come.
Loss and care;
oh, what have I become?
I kept a child’s eyes
as long as I could stand.
Along
somewhere,
I’ve come to understand,
that I don’t,
that I’m not,
never was,
been so lost.
I thought I knew,
thought I had,
dust to dust,
all to sand,
all to ash.
This feels like dying inside.
This feels like losing faith.
No need for false bravado,
or slick exteriors,
here it’s okay to be
broken in a thousand pieces.
Suffering is requisite
for divine consideration.
Honest as it is painful,
true as it is precise.
The angel on your shoulder
conquers the Devil twice.
Stop
coming back
to the place
that stained your soul.
Stop
turning back,
keep your head
and keep control.
Just admit
your weaknesses
and know
that this is how it goes.
It never is,
it never was,
sunshine and a rose.
It’s always knives.
It’s always war.
It’s always tests
of who we are.
It’s been like this
long before
we ever made it this far.
So innocence
Quietly dies,
was probably dead
a thousand times.
I close a child’s eyes
and open up
to this life.
It’s time to choose,
to take a stand.
No more remorse,
no will to bend.
For times are hard
for weaker men
and harder times
breed strength in them.
Little did I know
that I knew
what to do
the whole time.
Maybe we’re not
so badly equipped
after all.
We’re just afraid
to say good-bye
and step outside.
HG – 2018
