A Mosquito Sacrifice

This is the time

that I will finally give

to you and your designs,

to do with what you will,

for I just wasted mine;

a worthy sacrifice.

I hope that you are sated,

but I’m not done unwinding

myself from the lie.

Here’s another tie.

This is my desire,

sharpened to a knife

that I might sacrifice

my lust, my love,

my life.

The end of my designs,

my plot’s now full of holes,

stabbed a dozen times

and left to die alone.

So I might get to find

myself outside my drives,

appetites and libido.

 

Heaven only knows

if this will please You.

So I keep on going.

Here is my whole life.

My heart, my mind, my soul.

That I have felt unworthy;

that I can’t lift it up

out of the Damned Quagmire.

 

The hate, the lust, the shadow.

The weak material.

I am doomed to fail.

The life of a mosquito;

driven to consume,

then swiftly do we die.

So take this dusty vessel,

this wounded spirit

and this haunted mind as well

and use them for your purpose.

 

Something better than

all this banal pleasure,

immaculate delight.

It all comes with a price

and I’m about to pay it;

that and more besides.

Lift my eyes to the sky

and call upon this union;

a bargain with my Father,

a deal with existence.

I just want

to make this a little better.

Sick of taking without giving,

learning to do no harm.

This is a sacrifice.

 

HG – 2018

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