I used to think
a lot of things
I don’t think now.
My attitude’s improved,
at least I like to think
I don’t go so far down.
Man, I’m alive
and that’s alright,
but I don’t think it’s enough.
I’ve got a lot of stuff,
I’ve lived high,
I’ve lived rough,
but I still don’t know what
I’m missing.
Then some guy pulls up
in a jacked up truck,
taking up two parking spaces.
Talking on his phone,
makes himself at home;
entitled for entitlement’s sake.
It’s an old cliché,
it’s a real old saying,
but I’m pretty positive;
that ride,
that guy,
dripping all that pride
is probably a negative.
I gotta step back then,
stop myself,
because I’m no better than
any other man.
It’s that pride
that words its way inside,
like poison,
or a new infection.
It’s so easy
to seduce me with me,
when I’m feeling so damn sexy.
The mirror
and my echo chamber view
confirms my suspicions,
but it’s just
another lie I tell myself
and I can lie to me all day
Build up a hall of mirrors,
feeling so superior,
while I’m just another part to play.
I devalue myself
by getting on my high horse
and riding off into a fake sunset.
Man,
I gotta slow my roll,
bring myself home,
put down my phone
and bask back in my anonymity.
I’m no better than
any other man.
I’m just breathing my breaths,
playing chess with Death
and trying
to make good on a promise.
I gotta
let me go.
It’s the only way
I’ll know
what I’m really worth.
HG – 2018
