Permission

They say that it’s OK.

We can be any kind of way.

Everybody has a little larceny in them,

but I don’t want to offend,

or be their friend.

It’s just so easy

and I just lose myself

in the end.

 

I gave up drugs

and nicotine

to be the man that I could be.

They said that they could see

I had potential to exceed.

 

My goals were their goals,

my world was their throne.

I thought I had it figured out,

didn’t think it would explode.

 

In life I find

nothing is certain,

light only knows

where we go,

but I’m dying,

of that I am certain.

 

Day by day,

moment by moment,

I have taken back my skin,

retrieved my heart and mind from them.

Gave God my soul, my word, my sin

and grit my teeth to start again.

I found love without their permission

and gave myself the gifts you can’t.

 

Stepped back in gaze

upon the bigger picture

and found out that I was

just a tiny spot.

So I decided to burn

bright and hot.

So I’ll be seen long after I’m gone.

 

I’ll make my own mistakes.

I’ll learn just what it takes

to make my life a fire.

I’ll find my own desires.

 

I used to think

I needed their assent,

but I am not like them.

 

HG – 2017

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