I couldn’t comprehend the difference,
I didn’t see the day had come,
no longer a shimmering mirage
on the horizon.
Instead, it was now,
it was present;
a day of reckoning.
We do not always have a chance
to see ourselves
in a distant,
third-person way.
It’s nothing like catching yourself in the mirror,
this is clearer;
disturbingly so.
And when I turned my eyes towards me,
I could see myself
seeing myself.
There was both judgement and pity in my eyes.
That’s when I realized,
that I’ve been lucky enough
to live long enough
to regret everything I’ve ever done.
Every sin,
every word spoken quickly.
Every look,
every selfish affair.
Every time I’ve put myself
over another,
my own gaze laid me bare.
The meter that you use to measure others,
will be used to measure you.
I understand it now.
In that look I gave myself,
I know I knew.
There is no denying God.
The lies we tell ourselves
are the lonely road to hell,
like angels when they fell,
succumbing not to gravity,
but something else
that carried
enough weight to drag them down.
It was how they saw themselves.
When we’re deceived,
the thing in the mirror
can devour us alive,
and consume our hearts and minds.
We do it all the time.
But I’ve been fortunate enough
to see myself,
seeing myself;
not a reflection,
but I a meeting
one on one.
I never realized
that I’ve been lucky enough
to regret everything I’ve ever done.
HG – 2016
Amen. Beautifully done.
Thank you!
Welcome ^.^ Have a goodie!