I Am an Explosion

If emotions could bleed,

if sensations could breathe,

my decisions would be

better you’d see.

I am an explosion,

waiting to detonate,

expression and questions,

I don’t think I can wait

anymore.

 

I have been sitting for so long

in a sedentary state.

Detained by the limitations

of the world,

but this is my world,

so why did I create,

something so loathsome and negative,

living off some broken promises.

I have been pumping adrenalin,

getting in touch with my skeleton.

 

I am just my skin and bones.

I am running out alone.

I was broken by the stones,

I gave the world to throw.

Sometimes we’re better off exposed.

 

I haven’t yet died.

I’m waiting to go off,

waiting to cry.

So fucking desperate

to climb from inside,

out in the light

where I’ll stretch out my stride.

Holding and hoping,

arms open wide.

Never contained again,

out of my brain again,

out of my mind.

 

I am a high explosive charge,

keeping me in so far

has been so hard.

My, myself and I have been apart,

all I need is a spark.

All that it takes to start;

to light this fuse

and maybe lose

my obsolete and useless parts.

 

I’d rather go down in flames

than be something to discard.

One day I’ll be among the stars.

One day I’ll be me

and then you’ll see,

that I was never meant for

all this vain futility.

One day you’ll look up

and you’ll see pieces of me.

One day I’ll be free.

 

HG – 2016

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