If emotions could bleed,
if sensations could breathe,
my decisions would be
better you’d see.
I am an explosion,
waiting to detonate,
expression and questions,
I don’t think I can wait
anymore.
I have been sitting for so long
in a sedentary state.
Detained by the limitations
of the world,
but this is my world,
so why did I create,
something so loathsome and negative,
living off some broken promises.
I have been pumping adrenalin,
getting in touch with my skeleton.
I am just my skin and bones.
I am running out alone.
I was broken by the stones,
I gave the world to throw.
Sometimes we’re better off exposed.
I haven’t yet died.
I’m waiting to go off,
waiting to cry.
So fucking desperate
to climb from inside,
out in the light
where I’ll stretch out my stride.
Holding and hoping,
arms open wide.
Never contained again,
out of my brain again,
out of my mind.
I am a high explosive charge,
keeping me in so far
has been so hard.
My, myself and I have been apart,
all I need is a spark.
All that it takes to start;
to light this fuse
and maybe lose
my obsolete and useless parts.
I’d rather go down in flames
than be something to discard.
One day I’ll be among the stars.
One day I’ll be me
and then you’ll see,
that I was never meant for
all this vain futility.
One day you’ll look up
and you’ll see pieces of me.
One day I’ll be free.
HG – 2016