I have walked up above.
I have been lost below.
My faith in a dangerous place,
paying the cost I know.
I have been in pain
and I have been afraid.
I do it anyway;
whatever it takes
to kill the day.
I have seen no end
of charlatans and madmen.
I looked into their eyes.
I took them at their word.
I believed all the lies,
said they wanted to burn the world.
I handed them the match,
doused myself in gas,
watched the coward come
and snatch the light from them.
I have always imagined
myself as the hero,
but so does every good villain;
it puts the lie to what we know.
I could have made a killing,
bled fire like a volcano.
I just forgot what it was,
I just forgot the way…
…home.
I have blinded my eyes
staring at the Sun
and I know I’m not the only one.
I’m picking at my flaws,
to reveal my insides.
Not sure what I’ll find.
Not sure what I was
before I lost my mind.
Am I beautiful light,
or hungry dark?
Am I just a fire
waiting for a spark?
All I know is that this life is growing cold.
I’ve never been so exposed;
uncomfortable,
vulnerable.
Lost in places where nobody goes.
So far up above,
so far down below.
HG – 2016
